Mad Woman Blog

We always remember where we are when people who have had profound effects on our lives pass away.

I can distinctly remember for instance, where I was when I found out that John Lennon had died. For the record, pardon the pun, I was in my apartment in London listening to BBC radio 1, and wondering why the DJ was playing Beatles records constantly and sounding absolutely suicidal while he did it. And then of course I found out why.

Steve Jobs also had a profound effect on my life, so I will always remember where I was when he died too. (Well, I was at home working on my Apple Mac of course, using all my various Apple software, and surrounded by every Apple product known to man, woman, child, cat, dog and budgerigar.)

Steve was a genius. He may well have been the head honcho of Apple, but in reality he was also the Chief Visionary Officer for all us human beings, too. And like no other guy or gal in our generation, he had the ability to imagine the products, gadgets and technology of the future and the vision to bring them to life today.

Luckily for us, Steve’s all-seeing eye — or should that be “i”— led him to give us the iMac, the iPod, the iPhone, the iPad and, of course, iTunes, and in short order. In doing so, he revolutionized the way we live, work, play and communicate. So no wonder Twitter was #isad when he died.

Steve Jobs was also a brilliant “creative” business guy. While many of his contemporaries brought boring-looking, dollar-generating products to market — I’m not mentioning any names here to protect the geeks in question — Jobs adopted a different strategy. He believed that the way to worldwide success, and personal satisfaction actually, was to create products that were beautiful outside and in, and that consumers would absolutely adore.

He therefore hired engineers, industrial designers and graphic designers to ensure that Apple’s products were not only more innovative and easier to use, but looked cooler and hipper than the competition too.

The fruits of everyone’s labor paid off as millions of people bought and devoured Apples, and the company’s profits soared as a result. (Note to all the suits out there who think creative people can’t run businesses: Er, yes they can!)

Unlike many of his silicon chip and blue chip CEO rivals, Steve Jobs was also an extraordinary marketer, perhaps the greatest marketer of his generation in fact. He understood that people don’t buy products, they buy brands. Jobs therefore controlled all aspects of his company’s brand and imbued every product and retail store with Apple’s cool, sophisticated, stylish brand values.

He also hired world-class advertising agencies and invested heavily in the brilliant campaigns that they developed for him. And to great effect too. The “Think Different” and “I’m a MAC, I’m a PC” campaigns worked wonders for Apple, and undoubtedly helped the company establish itself as the brand leader in so many industry sectors.

Steve did an amazing job of direct marketing too — by directly marketing his new products to the industry and the press himself at various trade shows and conferences. And doing so in a way that demonstrated his honest and sincere belief in their potential to greatly impact our lives.

Was he a difficult guy at times? Well, that’s what they say. Did he have incredibly high expectations? You bet. Did he push his people to do better? Every day, and by some accounts every night too. Geniuses are not the easiest people to work for, as many of his employees will attest.

But Steve Jobs leaves behind an extraordinary legacy, a plethora of breathtaking, ground breaking products and a company in Apple, that recently surpassed Exxon Mobil to become the most valuable on the planet. And everyone at Apple should be proud of that.

There have been many words written about Steve Jobs since he passed away, but none have captured him perfectly — none that is, except a paragraph of copy written for a wonderful 1997 Apple commercial that was produced by TBWA/ Chiat Day.

The words were written to describe many of the geniuses that had enriched our lives by that point in time — including Albert Einstein, John Lennon, Maria Callas, Martin Luther King and Amelia Earhart. Fourteen years later, those words apply to Steve Jobs totally and absolutely. And here they are:

“Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do. “

Yes, Steve really did change the world. So where were you when Steve Jobs died? More to the point, where were we all when Steve Jobs died? In a far better place because he actually lived.

Last week was a sensational one for Rupert Murdoch and Co. Instead of reporting on the news, Rupert, his family and News International actually made all the news, as the Hackgate scandal exploded onto the world’s front pages. Revelations came thick and fast, resignations abounded, arrests were made and pants were undoubtedly soiled. It was truly amazing to watch it all unravel.

Now, as we all know, Mr. Murdoch and his family own numerous publications, including a number of newspapers that are famous for their exaggerated, factually distorted, often sordid, very funny and nearly always punny headlines.

So in order to give you the lowdown on the hearings that were held last week, I thought it would be appropriate for me to describe the various goings on in the tabloid headline style of the masters — The Sun, The Daily Star, The Daily Mirror, The New York Post, and of course, the dearly departed News Of The World.

(Note that I have included both Murdoch and non-Murdoch owned publications in my list of “tabloid headline masters” as I do of course want to be as fair and balanced as the Fox News owners would expect me to be.)

Here then are the “facts” about the hearings as reported by various media outlets, and the imaginary tabloid “headlines” as created by this media outlet, i.e. yours truly.

Fact: On Tuesday July 19, Rupert Murdoch, one of David Cameron’s biggest supporters, was called before parliament to testify about the Hackgate scandal.

Headline: Man blamed for David Cameron’s election finally held to account.

Fact: Murdoch’s wife, Wendi Deng, attended the hearings in support of her husband and sat behind him as he spoke.

Headline: Woman stands by her man as he testifies about boobs.

Fact: Rupert Murdoch’s son, James, was also called to testify, but it remains to be seen whether his was successful in assuaging the concerns of MPs.

Headline:  MPs don’t buy The Son!

Fact: As attention turned constantly back to Rupert Murdoch himself, the severity of the situation facing the News International chairman became increasingly apparent.

Headline: Phone hacking puts Murdoch’s ass on the line.

Fact: Although the various members of the committee were deferential to and respectful of Mr. Murdoch, they still pressed him repeatedly to answer important questions about the scandal.

Headline: Fox News owner hounded by animals in parliament.

Fact: In the course of the hearings, Rupert Murdoch denied any knowledge of the widespread phone hacking that has allegedly taken place at News International.

Headline:  Rupert Murdoch confesses to being a know nothing!

Fact:  Rupert Murdoch also stated for the record that he was let down by people he had trusted at News International and they in turn, were let down by people they trusted.

Headline: Man who made billions passes buck.

Fact: Towards the end of the proceedings, a British comedian, Jonnie Marbles walked up to Murdoch unchallenged and shoved a shaving cream pie straight in to his face.

Headline: Murdoch eats humble and shaving cream pie!

Fact: Wendi Deng immediately jumped to her feet and punched Marbles in retaliation for his assault on her husband.

Headline: Hack Wars: The Empress strikes back!

Fact:  After a 10 minute recess, Rupert Murdoch bravely continued his testimony, apparently unfazed by the shaving cream pie attack.

Headline: Nudespaper baron continues to bare all in hearings.

Fact:  Before the end of the proceedings, Rupert Murdoch confessed that whenever he visited Downing Street, he was asked to enter by the back door, and duly obliged.

Headline: It’s official! Murdoch confesses to back door deals with Downing Street!

Fact: News International stock’s price rose during the course of the day and ended up by 5.6%, at just under $16 a share.

Headline: Wall Street wankers put their faith in phone hacking plonkers!

The fact is headlines sell newspapers.  And no one knows that better than Rupert Murdoch. But as he reflects on a week where he, his family and former employees made all the headlines themselves, I suspect he won’t be too upset. Because the News International scandal is, after all, selling millions of newspapers — including many of his own.

Last week, the unemployment rate in America, went up by at least one, as Anthony Weiner finally did the decent thing — in my humble opinion any way — and resigned as a member of the US House of Representatives. Yes folks, Anthony Weiner is leaving the house to get his own house in order. Awesome!!

As Anthony will be considering his career options sometime soon, I would like to give him a few, helpful suggestions in my capacity of business and image adviser extraordinaire. So dear Anthony, put that blackberry down and listen up because here I go. (more…)

Unless you’ve been living on the planet Krypton, you will know that male superhero movies are dominating the entertainment world here on earth at the moment. Films starring Thor, Green Hornet, Green Lantern and Captain America have all hit the big screen already or will be doing so shortly.

It’s awesome fodder — if you like watching men in tights strutting their testosterone stuff, zapping the bad guys while talking gibberish, saving the world via incomprehensible storylines, and getting the girl in the end despite being unable to string two sentences together. (more…)

We Brits know a thing or two, or three or four about class. I, for instance, know that I am commoner. I was born and bred in a poor working class family, and I have my poor working class British accent to prove it. So you can safely assume that I didn’t have maids and servants to attend to my every need when I was growing up, and the only throne anyone in our family ever sat on was the one in the loo.

However, I also know that no matter how much wealth and privilege you’re born into, money can’t buy you class. So as I sat there in front of the TV last Friday morning watching the royal wedding — with a cup of British tea in one hand and a crumpet in the other — I thought it would be pretty interesting to see how many of the attendees would maintain or improve their public images and demonstrate that they were, well, class acts of course. (more…)

I’ve never liked peas. They are small, irritating little things and they sit on sides of plates vying with tastier and more colorful veggies for attention. (Think carrots, peppers, artichokes, potatoes, and my all time favorite, Swedish turnips.) But over the years, companies like Bird’s Eye have made millions out of these petit pois and they’ve invested mega mula to market them too. And I have to confess, that despite my life long loathing of peas, I was involved in one such marketing push.

There I was sitting in my office one lunch time devouring, well, a hamburger of course, when the Birds Eye Peas account director marched in. (Can’t remember the chap’s name after all these years, so for the purposes of this blog, he will be called Pea-ter.) The aforementioned Pea-ter was a man on a mission to put peas onto dinner plates in every house in Britain. (more…)

So March 8, 2011, was the day — the day when Howard Schultz, the chairman, president, CEO and Chief Barista of Starbucks unveiled the new Starbucks logo. You know, the one without the Starbucks name anywhere in sight. Now, if you’ve been wondering why one of the best-known companies in the world would want to change its famous logo, I have news for you. So have I.

So in attempting to understand how Starbucks arrived at this head scratching decision, I found myself imagining a conversation between Annie Young-Scrivner, the CMO — the chief marketing officer, or Chief Macchiato Officer if you prefer — and Howard Schultz himself.

And, in my little noggin, the conversation went something like this: (more…)

On Sunday, Americans did what they always do on Super Bowl Sunday. They gathered at each other’s houses, made chili, munched on chips and salsa, drank beer and gathered around the TV to watch the Super Bowl…ads.

As I did the very same thing myself, I thought I’d take some time out this week to give you my thoughts on the commercials that were dished up along with everything else.

Well, the evening started with a great ad for ear plugs as Christina Aguilera screeched her way through the national anthem, doing a passable impression of a cat in agony as she went. In addition to being off key, Christina was also “off script” as she managed to mangle the words to the national anthem at the same time. (Honey, get a grip! Even I don’t mangle the words to the national anthem and I’m British!) I was thankful that Christina’s performance ended in 2 minutes 14 seconds precisely — yes, I was counting — and so I think, was everyone else in America.

(more…)

Leo Burnett is one of the greatest ad guys in history. Though he has sadly departed to that great advertising agency in the sky, his philosophies and legacies live on — and none more so than his thoughts on how to produce the best possible creative work.

Leo once famously said: “Creative ideas flourish best in a shop which preserves some spirit of fun.” He instinctively knew that when creative people got in the mood and got in the groove, they could create campaigns that could launch their clients into the stratosphere and generate millions of dollars in revenue. (more…)

Well folks, the New Year is here, and it is of course time to make my psychic predictions for 2011. So I’ve already retrieved my crystal ball — it doubles as an ornament in one of the bathrooms at Brainwave — and given it a good polish with brand leading Pledge of course. And I’m now ready to deliver some wonderful words of insight to you my 14 avid readers. (Up from 13 since my last blog thanks to someone called B. Obama who signed up over the holidays because he needed some image advice.) So hang on to your hats, gloves and anything else that may blow off with the force of my impending “sound off” because here I go.

First of all, in the political world, I can confidently predict that John Boehner will not make it through any session of Congress without blubbing like a baby on the hour every hour. Mr. Boehner’s tear ducts will attract the attention of major advertisers, and he will be approached by none other than Kleenex, who will offer our recently dubbed “weeper of the house” a lucrative deal to become its spokesman. In doing so, Kleenex will beat out overtures from another company with perfect “John Boehner brand credentials”, Simply Orange. (more…)